Check me out! I could work for CNN!

Never mind. *embarrassed cough* Well, at least we all know I wasn't still awake at 7AM, so I'm making some progress.

Now if you'll excuse me, I must watch Michael Palin wander around Asia. At least I know that is, in fact, what he is doing.

Check me out! I could work for CNN!

I anticipate pandemonium.

Howard Stern is no longer on FM radio. As of this morning, his timeslot on K-Rock in NY has been filled by David Lee Roth, formerly of Van Halen. I was a little surprised--as was Stern, by the sound of the phone call he made to Roth's show--that there was no goodbye show after 20-something years, but then, that's the way Infinity does things. I think the only stations I ever heard do official farewell broadcasts were WNEW-AM, WPAT and WLIR, when they left 92.7, so why should one show get the honor? I know generally DJs are fired after they get off the air so they don't flip out ninja-style on-air, but for Stern to just disappear without so much as one last farting sound from so many stations...it's rather rude.

I wasn't actually a die-hard Stern fan, but as a kid I thought Fartman was hilarious, so I'll miss the silliness. But not much, because I shouldn't actually be awake at 6AM. One less reason to stay awake. Hear that, my hyper little brain? There's no one on the radio to listen to at that hour anymore. The end. But, I digress.

I haven't gone to the Radio Info NY board yet, but I'm heading over there as soon as I post this. I'm expecting at least one negative comment about the issue. Ha. Get a bunch of radio geeks together on a message board, and together they will like nothing.

I anticipate pandemonium.

Acronyms that steal my time.

(guys...I apologize ahead of time. This is what most of my posts would be like if I just posted off the top of my head.)

DSL--get working and stop losing sync in the middle of my research.

PMS--Gimme back the last twenty years of my life, bitch!

Okay, no point writing anymore as I'm sure I just drove everyone away.

Wait, come back! I did get to mow the lawn today, as it wasn't raining, and now all the bees will have to go hide someplace else. Oh, and my seven-foot-tall euonymus all have scale. While I'm pissed off about that, it does explain why hosing all the plants down with milk last year didn't do a thing to help. When the "powdery mildew" bleeds upon being crushed, it is not powdery mildew. Learn from my mistake, people.

Does anyone use pokeweed for lettuce? Did anyone expire after ingesting pokeweed lettuce? Would you like some pokeweed? I have it growing where it doesn't belong (everywhere) and maybe I need to send it all farther away than the garbage dump, because it keeps coming back and now it's in my roses, and I ain't going in there after it. It won. *sigh*

Acronyms that steal my time.

All the things I could go on about and I just write the first thing that comes to mind.

Bay Plaza sure looks different up close. Or rather, it looks a lot less cluttered from the other side of the Mini-Golf Driving Range.

I should come clean about something...I don't go out often, and I drive even less often. I used to, but the migraines--among other things--were more annoying than the outings were fun, so I stayed at home and had fun. Saved some money that way, too.

Sadly, the A&P up the road has closed due to a "shift to a non-union distributor" and so I now need to forage for food in another location. The next closest would be Stop & Shop, the other half of that legendary merger "Stop & P."

Keep in mind I stopped going out around the same time that I got my driver's license. I find this humorous now, so you can join me in a hearty laugh at the way things work. ha...ha...hmm.

There are entire malls that have been built in the time since I first said "Ya know, you all go on without me." I no longer know the way around my own neighborhood. There's basically two roads I know really well, and this is The Bronx, there are way more than two roads to anything in this area. I should be ashamed of myself, I know. However, I'm not, I'm kinda grateful I don't have to do a lot of the main roads with the buses and the various construction trucks, because I fear vehicles that are ten times larger than me.

I had thought to myself this morning that I was a wuss compared to say, the crew of Discovery. I mean, they could potentially explode at numerous points in their trip, and all I need to do is avoid buses and sunlight. So with that in mind I set off on my journey and didn't find out until later that the bleedin' shuttle didn't even go up today. Bah.

This entirely long lead-up ends with the news that I reached the parking lot of Stop & Shop, agreed with my mum that I now know how to get there, decided we don't need anything today, and went home. I only passed Bay Plaza, which is a serious traffic jam claiming to be a mall. I'd been to Bay Plaza a few times in the late '80s, when it was first built...I think I bought a Dogloo in the Rickel's there...in 1995...I saw The Phantom Menace there in '99...crikey, I really haven't been out much.

I'm happy to report that almost everyone in The Bronx owns really pretty color cars, though. I got to see several as I drove around asking "do I turn here?" like Sandra Bullock behind the wheel of a speeding bus.

No clue what's going in the A&P building yet, they better put something good in there.

(Many '80s songs played during the writing of this babble. Yay, Psych Furs!)

All the things I could go on about and I just write the first thing that comes to mind.

Oh, the humanity!

Something terrible has happened.

My Dish reciever has problems. It started by dropping Sirius 5 and 6--which, of course, will be where Cousin Brucie debuts this weekend. I didn't know this when the stations first dropped out, so I ignored it, because I had my 22, First Wave.

Today I get the bright idea to call tech support to get 5, 6, Food Network and whatever else was missing back.

Now I have no music stations. I have a bunch of PPV baseball stations and like, the religious stations, and those frikkin' UHF stations I never watch since the second dish I was do desperate for went up.

No music...except FM radio.

*curls up in ball, dies*

I guess I could always play my MP3s, but...it's not the same.

Dish is sending a new reciever, of course, but that won't be here until Saturday. Cousin Brucie will have had his first broadcast by then. AUGH!

Oh, the humanity!