Monday, May 22, 2006

How to stay young.

No, eating right won't save you, neither will laying off the mind-altering drugs.

Living with a puppy, however, is guaranteed to keep you running 20 hours a day, full blast, until nothing you ever did means anything, because all is puppiness. And kittens, because spending equal love time with the siblings is like, even more important that washing or brushing teeth.

This is Macadamia. (That's her screen name, and as far as the Internet goes, until she's old enough to come on here and start hooking up with boys, that's what I'm calling her.)

Macadamia--she will eat you.

Look into the eyes...they will paralyze you with the wave of cute...just before she eats you. To be fair, she only eats her immediate family humans, and not as much as she has in the past. My bruises are even fading.

The folks at North Shore Animal League told us she's a terrier/lab mix. Which pretty much means all the springiness of a Jack Russell, in the soon-to-be 40-pound body of a Labrador Retriever. I'm pretty sure she also has 53,000 other dogs in her lineage, and I pray none of them were insane. Honestly, I can't even say that for my own lineage, so why do I expect the puppy to know why she doesn't like other people or even like going outside of her backyard?

Oh yeah, she's my puppy. We wuv her.


Rainbow Heron said...


[everyone sings rapidly and dances stupidly]

Hey can you see us in the screen there Macadamia?
We love you already and hope you love us cuz we're nutty like your name there pretty girl-a.
Wanna have some toast and throw some cheer here Macadamia?

[everyone cheers, waves, asks pardon for the parody, and revels in awseome CUTE!ness]

Nice picee! Congrats again!

BrideOfPorkins said...

Thanks! I'd have more pictures, but she fears the sound of the camera. I have several butt shots.

Speaking of which, she's run to the back corner of the yard. Ah, okay she's flipped her ear up to hear you, that's a good sign. :)

I think she can see through the screen. She can see through walls, and clothes and a foot of dirt to get to things she wants to eat.

I wouldn't take any of the "candy" she might offer you, though. Not without a hazmat suit.