Daily Posting -- two for two ain't bad.

I like pie. I don't get to have pie often, and this is most likely why I still like pie.

Also, I made the effort to turn on the Sci-Fi network today, and I found Firefly. I liked Firefly, and it only took me three years to find that out. Somewhere, the squid of RASSM are happy today.

I left Sci-Fi on, and now I am currently watching two guys beat each other up on Battlestar Galactica. The original series with Lorne Greene used to scare the crap out of me, I have no idea why...but the end credits to Star Trek used to scare me too...I was a weird kid. I watched Alien about five times, but...Lorne Greene scared me. I don't think Bonanza had that effect, though.

Okay, commercials are over, HOLY CRAP, ARCHIE'S ON BSG!

Daily Posting -- two for two ain't bad.

Three random notes.

To Ms. Lourdes Bergamini:

You do not live here, stop telling everyone you do. I am not keeping your mail, as the medical bills are not even an interesting read. I hope the postman knows where to find you when he gets that postcard back.

....

To the dolphins who washed out to sea during Hurricane Katrina, I hope you guys have a plan, because I recently said you were the most brilliant creatures ever. I mean, it's lucky that dolphins are pretty good swimmers, but unluckily, these lived mostly in captivity and just sort of sat there waiting to be rescued. I guess there is good fish to be made in the aquarium circuit.

....

I'm not going to post messages to the New York Radio board anymore unless I know what I'm talking about. First, I freaked out because I forgot Chris Botti wasn't on Fridays, and now I've accused Emmis Communications of taking away my happy station when all they're planning to do is send people on vacations.

Silly, silly me.

Three random notes.

OMFG.

That's about my summary of current events. A more detailed opinion begins with me wondering how pathetic an emergency response to Terror™ would be, and it just spirals downhill from there. You don't want to read it, because really, you're probably already thinking it. Unless you've got a bunker high in the hills like that dude from In The Year 2889 and you're covered.

So yeah, I'm trying to avoid all the news networks and thanking the great Goodyear blimp that floats past my house that the US Open is on. That way I can make fun of the Williams sisters for not knowing what happened down south and I can feel good about myself because I know what's going on. Because I'm not entirely feeling good about myself these days. I was supposed to be rich enough to donate loads of money to animal rescue by now, you see. My master plan is failing.

The reason for this may very well be that I am a poor communicator. I received a reply to my note to Church & Dwight, makers of the Fabric Softener Sheets of Doom, about the allergic reaction I had to their product. I'm not kidding, I really wrote to them. I was PMS-ing, and felt it was better to take it out on the sellers of such crap rather than the buyers, who did not take fondly to my criticism of their choice in dryer sheets when I told them why I was loaded up on Benedryl. My original note went something like, "What fabric softening agents do you use? I had an allergic reaction to them," which right there was probably not the swiftest thing to tell them.

Remember kids: if you're allergic to prescription medication, nosebleeds are nothing compared to itching; if you're allergic to dryer sheets, itching is nothing compared to total central nervous system failure.

Right, so I really didn't expect a response of any kind, but I got one. And here it is:

Dear Ms. Naclerio:

Thank you for visiting our web site.  We appreciate your interest in our
company and our products.  It is nice to know that you enjoy using Nice'n
Fluffy® Fabric Softener Sheets, Mountain Rain.

At Church & Dwight Co., Inc., we strive to manufacture products of high
quality and performance that meet genuine consumer needs.  It is
gratifying to learn from you that our efforts are recognized and
appreciated.

The information that you have requested is proprietary.

Again, thank you for taking the time and having the interest to contact
us.

We hope you will visit our web site again at: WWW.CHURCHDWIGHT.COM; for
information about our company, products, history, and financial
information.

Marcia Williams
Consumer Relations Representative

I believe I was sent a form letter. Because I don't recall saying I enjoyed my experiences with their product. It amused me for a few hours, anyway, while I used it as another example of how advanced I think humans aren't. We're not, you know. I don't know of many dolphins that pollute the air, or mountain lions that hang around certain areas when they know there's going to be trouble. Then again, the mountain lions probably would eat the dolphins if they had to share a habitat for extended periods of time. Dolphin flippers don't look like they could hold off cats very well, but I may be wrong.

---

I get the feeling I should've just left it at "OMFG! If that happened here, I'd totally be dead now."

*hugs to all the people that lost everything*

OMFG.

How to kill me.

Or at least, give me a reaction similar to that of Clark Kent having his underoos laundered with kryptonite fabric softener.

Xtra Nice 'n Fluffy Mountain Rain Fabric Softener dryer sheets are of the devil. Either that, or they're infused with holy water and I am the vampire everyone has thought for so long. Tragically, I discovered the problem after putting on my pajamas. Oh yeah, and changing my undies, but that's just too much information, that.

Mace and pepper spray are illegal in NY as far as I know, but from here on, everyone wishing to ward me off, carry one of those dryer sheets and rub it into my face when I get too dangerous. It will take me roughly 12 hours to recover, and that's after the use of much water and allergy medication.

The ingredients on the box of dryer sheets says only that it contains "Fabric softening agents" and "Fragrance." At first, I thought it was just the fragrance, because perfume kills me (it does--the voodoo doctor is getting sick of reanimating me) but then, the hives were new. I have written a letter to Church & Dwight, asking what exactly the "agents" are. I don't expect an answer, but still, I needed to question someone, because the universe has given up answering my questions.

---

There are no Arrested Development episodes on tonight at 8. I'm sad, but I'm sure I'll find something to do while I wait for the 9th. The 9th. *sniffle*

How to kill me.

Oh, I found new music in the air from England again. Life is good.

Having been spammed back into posting (Go EGTY! Go far, far away!), I wish to report that I am way behind on my online reading, as I dropped the ball a few days back and once that baby rolls away, it takes a few days to catch. I cannot talk about how exactly I dropped the ball, because it involves my ISP's newsserver, and possibly the FBI. I could blame Arrested Development, but all those late-night re-runs were re-runs of the Friday mini-marathons, and so I still haven't seen most of the first season.

I scored some free movies through Harris Poll. Five years of doing polls finally paid off in the form of The 13th Warrior and An Ideal Husband. I like those two movies. I'm also devoting more time to my attempts to make money, and by money I mean the real stuff, because I can't use my memolink points for about 14 more weeks.

Other'n that, I'm still hatin' on large poisionous spiders and mind-altering drugs. Altering the mind is all well and good, but when vomit and angst is involved, that's when I say it's no fun anymore and start worrying about people.

I'm not even referring to the big news event of last week, which I forgot until just now. Two or three blocks away from my house, 13 people were arrested for running a heroin proccessing plant out of their house. All sorts of weaponry was found in the house along with about 6 million dollars worth of drugs. I'm hoping this means the local drug dealers will now move someplace else, having lost their provider and all. That's right, go prey on other neighborhoods, this "sleepy community" doesn't need you. I swear, the news called my neighborhood "quiet" and "sleepy." That made me proud. Perhaps a lot of people were being provided with a lot of drugs, but it's a nice area.

And that was the local news for the week.

(I'm listening to Gogol Bordello's Start Wearing Purple, which is playing on BBC Radio 1, which has just been added to the Dish/Sirius stations, which I love lots.)

Oh, I found new music in the air from England again. Life is good.