There'll Be No Living With Me. AGAIN.

This 30th day straight of posting to my blog ends with me saying holy crap I wrote another novel.

It's only a first draft, and I'll be tweaking that until next year, but there it is. I drew a bunch of comics and wrote a bunch of blog posts ahead of time so I could type all night long and all I got was this shiny, shiny banner.

It started as a weird idea I got from late night TV movies about Columbus and turned into the music-fueled sort of bizarre therapy that all my writing ends up being, but this one gave me a side character so great I want to just keep writing him until he runs into all my other characters and the universe implodes.

Okay, maybe not. I am tired so maybe that won't be such a great idea in the morning. But there it is. Fun time has its rewards, and it's a Viking on a coffee-colored boat telling me to go on a quest for coffee.

There'll Be No Living With Me. AGAIN.

The Long Trail Of Gravy

Hancock is actually as good as it looks in the ads! I know this from my viewings. Yes. Not that I sit around watching movies all the time, mind you, no. It's just the movies are the things I enjoy that I figure everyone can relate to. I inhale my cat's armpits a lot. See? Movies!

I'm missing Dancing With The Stars already, that show's just fun. I...guess I'm old now or something. I don't care, I love it. Totally got to see Cloris Leachman tango again, yay!

The night before Thanksgiving I not only burnt out, crashed and dissembled, my hands cracked off. It's very irritating, and I'm using present tense because I don't know if I'll live through the next three days and so this may be it...I never saw the pumpkin pie coming.

This next line is to let everyone know that of course I lived. That's the part that never fails to amaze me. But I am in no place to whine about my maladies when it could be much*...much...much worse. *I was going to link to something about the first much, but it's a family thing and not my story to tell. Suffice to say I am impressed by some people's ability to handle crap and not be whiny.

I, however, am whiny and dammit I missed seeing the wayward toolbag in space! I think. Unless the NASA Flyby website is accurate and it'll still be in orbit next week. I do realize I could just toss my own toolbag into the air and create the general effect, but the most expensive things in my toolbag are my chisels and they weren't even $30 all together. Plus I have chisel karma coming to me so the least amount of chisel misuse I partake in the better.

Nan found a movie called Zoo and it's like a David Lynch story...about a man who died after an encounter with a horse.

Sunshine, the Danny Boyle movie about an amazing cast trying to re-ignite the sun, was also really good, but then I'm a sucker for the skiffy. Even if it does involve extreme sunburn.

I spent the rest of the time adding to my NaNoWriMo wordcount.

The Long Trail Of Gravy

Funny How Time Flies.

Anyone who is in on my bizarre childhood bet that Tears For Fears might still be around in 25 years, specifically that people might remember one particular song by them, and know how I obsess over that date of November 26, 2010 like I'm actually going to have done something great by then will get why I'm posting the literal version of Head Over Heels by Tears For Fears today (last Friday in November already), and if you're not in on that...this video is frikkin' genius!

Funny How Time Flies.

The Streets Will Run With The Gravy Of The Non Pie-Eaters

Happy Thanksgiving, everybody! Having digestive disorders has taught me holidays aren't about food, they're about sappy warm fuzzy loving of your loved ones, so have a good time however you do it where you are, and as always thanks for reading my blog, it really keeps me going. Seriously.

Of course after you read my chilling tale of horror you may rethink encouraging me. *ahem*

On a chilly November morning, one shot rang out in warning
The ones who could fly took to the sky
Carrying the signal that justice was dawning.

From coast to coast many humans played host
To travellers hungry for flesh.
Restaurants and food banks all shared the same boast
That their turkeys had just arrived fresh.

From ovens and freezers, the vigilantes rose
Taking up weapons their slaughterers chose
"Pardon me!" the headless turkeys said
Pulling out muskets to shoot the chefs dead.

The sun set on houses engulfed in flames
Grinders ground down the meat-eaters' remains
A message was left in the ransacked malls
Smeared ten feet high in blood on the walls
A simple wish meant for you and I

EAT PIE OR DIE.

The Streets Will Run With The Gravy Of The Non Pie-Eaters

Getting Along Through Papercuts!

Hey kids, while your parents are off cooking and stuff, why not leave them alone and play with sharp instruments! YAY!



With the Papercraft Thanksgiving you can create as friendly or as bloody a festival as your heart desires!

Keep in mind that once the papercraft turkey has been beheaded and plucked, he looks awfully square and tastes really dry.

Getting Along Through Papercuts!

You Can't Not Look

Oh noez, I've caught BadWinter! And it feels kinda good!

While to me there's no such thing as a bad winter, The Flowfield Unity is one of my regular favorites and now that it's back from a semi-dead state and has infected me with the desire to tell you all about it, go have a look around.

You Can't Not Look

All I Need To Install Now Is A Brain Widget.

For Christmas of 1983, I was given my first boombox, and aside from my desklamp it was the only thing that really lasted of my presents. My radio, mine all mine, I listened to my Olivia Newton-John tapes and Return of the Jedi soundtrack until...well, until this Star Wars/Xanadu slash happened. And I hadn't even seen that Bob Hope special!

Then I was given a headset radio. This...well, I am a walking experiment for whether those things cause dain brammage because this started the glorious way of life known as having a soundtrack for everything. 21 years, give or take a few weeks, ten radio station format flips and 6 headsets later, I still use it for my FM transmitting of whatever's coming out of the 20-pound MP3 player on my desk (yes, they're legal...or out of print, but don't get me started on I'll Be Around by What Is This?) and now...now I have a new drug.

Once I figured out how to use the radio player, Last.FM became a fun little land. I went so far doctoring up a desktop widget for Active Desktop and made my own widget for the Vista set up based on these instructions.

Finally my inner radio geek with an agenda can have Making Plans For Nigel go right into Duel Of The Fates and then Somebody Told Me into Xanadu and I don't have to change a tape or anything. YES, I WOULD BE DROOLING IF I COULD.

All I Need To Install Now Is A Brain Widget.

Something to Drive You Insane

Oddio Overplay has these playlists, like the page full of birthday music, and it's all legal to download, so...party on!

Something to Drive You Insane

Long Dark Tea Time Of The Coffee Drinker

I've missed a lot of older movies, you know. I mean, somehow I've gone all these years never having see Long Day's Journey Into Night. Being Thanksgiving is right around the corner I think it was a good time for me to see this movie so I can say without a doubt thank god I'm not in that family. I felt nasty writing that, but damn. The funny part is when it started and Katherine Hepburn was going on about being fat Nan--who also wasn't familiar with the story--joked that she sounded like me...when I was like, 19 and thirty pounds overweight, I guess. Because I think that's the last time I pointed out I was fat, then I took a load of Sudafed and--no, no, that's even funny, the subjects in the story were not in any way funny and sometimes I think I need to be pretty grateful that I live in my nice warm cave.

Hellboy II: The Golden Army is out on video and Nan *hearts* Abe Sapien. I've enjoyed everything I've seen from Guillermo del Toro so I was in happy land for about two hours. And OMG The Hobbit is going to be fantastic.

One night Nan found an old Christopher Lambert movie called Resurrection, and eh...if you like Se7en this is sort of like that. Except it's a bit more graphic. By a bit I mean dismemberment is part of the plot. It was really good, though.

Our dryer split its belt a full week before Thanksgiving but the Internet saved our collective sanity. See, in the old days we'd be all ZOMGDOOM! but I calmly typed "dyrer dum not tuerng" and got forty billion hits that boiled down to check the belt, which I did. Solved! It was funny when Steve the dryer repairman went to wash his hands and noticed our crappy faucet that only works when someone uses the sprayer. It's on the list. Not next on the list, because it still works, even if it works very oddly.

I'm still doing NaNoWriMo, because I'm stubborn. Heh. I'm on par for the day (note that as I'm writing this I don't have my exact wordcount but it's close) and I think I can make it to the end despite discoverng the Monty Python YouTube channel.

Long Dark Tea Time Of The Coffee Drinker

When I No Longer Know What Day It Is, It Must Be Friday

I'm writing a lot lately. I had tomorrow's post scheduled to run today, which was weird as today is not Saturday, no matter how much I try to make it so.

I got it into my head to try writing a random thing here based on some further randomization I found on Flickr, like I went there and typed some words I thought would make so sense...how was I to know cupcake megatron would return 30 photos?

So I moved on.

"Drunken bastard" happened to be in my browser auto complete as part of NaNoWriMo research and that provided a ridiculous amount of rather calm-looking photos.

So I moved on.

I got stuck in my epic NaNoWriMo story after a spectacular cramp in a part of my (upper) body I was not aware possessed muscles. I think I ought to have my characters arrested for loitering, they've been hanging out in the same place so long. However the way I wrote that the main character is holding three separate things and just used both hands to do something makes me wonder just how many hands this girl possesses, and if it's a common mutation in her world as someone let her borrow their coat and there was no, "OMG my ten other arms won't fit."

So I moved on.

My wordcount features a good amount of threes.

When I No Longer Know What Day It Is, It Must Be Friday

An Important Warning

You see this leaf? This leaf drive the cats wild.



That leaf tastes nasty.

I got nothing from it but a weird burning on the tip of my tongue.

An Important Warning

Nowhere Else On Earth That I Would Rather Be

Odds are that as this is being posted by the millions of little people who live in the tubes of the Internet, I'm off careening down some street swearing loudly at the maniacs who have someplace more important to be than the delightful back streets of Co-Op City. I can't blame them at all, I am most likely also looking to get as far from the road as I can, because it's like the Autobahn, but with traffic cameras.

It isn't a road I have to travel, it isn't a road I need to travel, it certainly isn't a road I want to travel. But I'm doing it because someone needs me to do it, which was the whole reason I got a driver's license in the first place.

If the lights are in my favor and give me a few seconds to think every now and then, I will lament not being home with my cats and dog, taking pictures and writing ridiculous stories. Even if the lights are not in my favor you can be sure that right now I'm wishing I was on any other road.

Nowhere Else On Earth That I Would Rather Be

Is It...Jangly?

While I'm off trying to get to 50k words before the end of the month, I thought I'd share with you my failed attempt to be a music reviewer. I feel bad sometimes that I never share what really goes on day to day in my life, and once I rule out discussing my health and really deep thoughts (it gets so much worse than last week) I just seem to be someone who watches movies and chops down vines a lot. But a lot of the time I'm off trying to get my feet in various doors and this year I went completely apeshit and ended up looking like some terrible industrial Twister accident. Did you know there's an all-pink version of Twister? What is that about? And what's with the Toys 'r Us reviewers reviewing the model on the box? Wow.

Anyway, I thought it'd be fun to review music, being that's something I do in my head almost every day. Apparently my editor did not agree. (For those keeping score at home, I think the editor left the position. Like...I did it again. DJs, TV shows, and now editors? Is nothing safe around me?!) I was never contacted again after submitting what follows, and dammit, I don't like to see my words go to waste, especially being I spent three days listening to an album I normally wouldn't have by a band I'd never heard of and ended up really liking it. Keep in mind I was directed to write more words that I thought necessary, and YouTube is an amazing research tool. ^_^

I give you Lunglight by The Shaky Hands. It's part of my life, kids.

Don't let the jangly surf rock bounciness fool you, The Shaky Hands have come from looking the world straight in the face and being slightly jaded by what's to be seen. Originating in Portland, Oregon, where the space needle emits waves of rock brilliance over much of the population, The Shaky Hands' second outing Lunglight was released in September on Holocene/KRS and features many songs that have until now only been heard at their live shows. Not long after their self-titled debut album, the band became a quintet when multi-instrumentalist Nathan Delff joined his brother, vocalist and guitarist Nick Delff, guitarist Jeff Lehman and bassist Mayhaw Hoons, but is once again a quartet since the departure of percussionist Colin Anderson two months prior to this album's release.

The album opens right up with a rocking call for an end to the wicked and hope for the peaceful in A New Parade and rolls right along into the to the fun wisdom of Loosen Up, a crowd favorite at shows. The fittingly titled Air Better Come never lets up on its feverish speed and the playful-sounding reminder to live, We Are Young, has yielded the first video from the album, directed by Yoni Kiffle and E*Rock. The album has been called darker in tone and around the middle the reason becomes apparent with Neighbors and World's Gone Mad, two lyrical stories which blend into each other, starting out as Tool-tinged music to watch your disturbing neighbors by and ending with a wider view of the darkness in the world. The introspection continues with No Say, a stirring song about being painfully different. The upbeat feeling returns in the affectionate You're The Light and continues through the soundtrack to a perfect date in the life of the world-weary, Show Me Your Life. The clever lyrics of Settle On shine but after the cloudiness threatens to return on Love All Of, optimism fights for control again on Wake The Breathing Light, the longest track of the album clocking in at just under five minutes. Oh No, the final track, may mirror your thoughts as this album ends, but have no fear, the band is promising an EP of live tracks very soon.

Each track on Lunglight manages to remain infectiously unique despite being carried by similar driving beats, sometimes evoking the sound of The Strokes, other times digging into Rockpile, but always retaining the definitive sound of The Shaky Hands. If you liked their first album, you'll love this just as much if not more, and if you've never heard of The Shaky Hands give Lunglight a listen, over and over again.

(Did I sell you on it? Here's the video for We Are Young.)

Is It...Jangly?

Ninja Bake Sale at Sundown

It is a little known fact that Ninja are excellent confectioners. Obviously they excel at all they do, but the traditional Ninja Bake Sale that takes place every autumn is unknown to many, even those who have attended year after year.

Perhaps you've been walking down the street, any given day after the end of Daylight Saving Time, and suddenly a cream puff begins melting in your mouth. Is it your cream puff? Odds are it's the result of many years' effort by a skilled master of pastry and death. So even if your pockets have been slashed and all the change removed, thank a ninja the next time a donut lodges in your windpipe some blustery day. They made them with love.

(This has been one of my late-night "WTH am I going to post next week?" posts. I made it with love. And throwing stars.)

Ninja Bake Sale at Sundown

Just The Thing A Vulgarian Like Me Requires!

All my life I've tried to be a proper lady, keeping my bra straps up and enunciating my swearing clearly. As if by magic, my Twittering was followed by the learned professorial blokes at English For Dirty Foreigners.



I feel less dirty already!

Just The Thing A Vulgarian Like Me Requires!

Quick! Fire! Pool!

It's nearly pointless to review the week when I've been posting all week. It's like me coming here saying I'm happy The Puppy didn't run off with the little flag I put near my grandfather's tree for holidays, then I flipped out because gay Californians can't marry anymore, then things got really weird.

I found a game that managed to throw me off my NaNoWriMo word goals called Quick Fire Pool, which is not about The Osterman Weekend as the title might suggest. No, it's about shooting pool...really really fast. Sort of like how I play it in real life, and judging by my 1077th place score, exactly like how I play it in real life.

When not potting virtual balls I'm supposed to be writing that story for NaNoWriMo, and apparently in my overacheiving frenzy I'm also unofficially doing NaBloPoMo, and they may cancel each other out but one of my LJ friends pointed me towards Write or Die or WOD, just to throw some more acronyms out there, and holy wow is that fascinating. It's like a game...and you know how I like games. This game has a setting that eats words, and I'm not hardcore enough to go there yet, but I got my wordcount over the daily goal for the first time by using Write or Die. Of course a lot of my characters are now running around yelling, "OMG we're gonna die!"

All my RSS feeds did this crazy thing where posts from over a year ago showed up as new. Overnight I grew 1000 unread items, and at first I was all excited because I thought there were people posting who hadn't in ages. Then I was all excited because I actually remembered reading the posts once.

A few nights last week the Chiller station played Evil Of Frankenstein starring Peter Cushing. In Frankenstein's defense, it's the hypnotist's fault the monster turns to crime. I love these, though, and the Burgomeister's screaming wife needs a fanbase if she doesn't have one already.

There was a movie on Lifetime the next night that featured such incredible acting I think I may send some bits of lumber and cotton balls to acting school and see if I can become their agent if they get starring roles in movies like this. I had no idea what the hell the name of this masterpiece was so I looked up the only actor I recognized in it, Jeff Fahey, and then I guessed it was California Firestorm aka Inferno. Surprise, I guessed right! It's right up there with City On Fire for loads of people in flaming lands freaking out and in the case of Inferno, being completely unable to cry. There was lots of cringing and wincing, but no tears...onscreen at least.

And then a huge fire broke out in California and made this entire week in review very very awkward.

Quick! Fire! Pool!

The Eight Demands Of Migraines

I Am Having A Migraine, Therefore I Am A Migraine

Thou Shalt Not Make Me Want To Kill You

Thou Shalt Not Idolize Rave Lights

Thou Shalt Put No Billy Mays Before Me

Thou Shalt Not Make Wrongful Smells

Remember The Migraine Days And Clear The Schedule

Thou Shalt Not Empty The Medicine Bottle Without Replacing It

Thou Shalt Not Claim To Understand The Triggers, For They Are Mysterious And Many, And Violaters Shall Be Cast Into Puke

The Eight Demands Of Migraines

Oh Glorious Boobie-Sparing Brain Lightning!

By now the news has been everywhere that women with migraines are 30% less likely to develop breast cancer and man oh man, I am THRILLED.

Of course it could be the painkillers some women take for the migraines, it could be the ants, it could be that those women just weren't going to get breast cancer, but no, here is a reason for doctors the world over to tell women to be glad they puke while driving, to embrace their inability to watch TV with the lights off, and holy crap, yay for periods! Because there is now only a 70% chance that their body will give a big up yours to them in two different ways! OH BOY!

Janet Jackson fans, rejoice.

Oh Glorious Boobie-Sparing Brain Lightning!

The History of Made Up Rules Makes Me Shudder

Is it even a surprise that I'm embarrassed that Prop. 8 passed in California and Amendment 2 passed in Florida? Last week the abortion bans on various tickets were shot down and gave women one less thing to worry about (for a while, anyway), and a man was elected who gave an entire generation of kids something to feel good about. But some people in California who were already married, who already had the right to marry, had that taken away by a group of lobbyists and...what?

What the flipping hell, people? Did you wake up last week thinking, "Give us progress--but not too much!" Do you really think the economy is shot because only one man goes to work while the other stays home and decorates? Do you really think limiting the amount of hot lesbian action is going to stop global warming? Do you really think other countries will be so horrified if people who happen to have matching genitals want to raise a family? Did you really...think? Did you even realize that voting yes on Prop. 8 meant "No, you lot over there, you can't." Or did someone tell you how to think, because you don't really care one way or the other?

The fact that I'm following my own opinion with Keith Olbermann's may give you an out, you know, "Oh, she listens to HIM," but it's the other way around, he said what I wanted to say better (and a bit less volatile) than I just said it. Maybe it comes off like I waited for him to say something before I did, but no, I've been busy and the last few posts were set to go on the dates they were posted, but this one today...this one's live.

I'm too many miles away from the protests, and I thought after last week I could put the soapbox away for a while, but love itself is need of love today, and that's all that matters, and to go for the trifecta, it's the only thing that there's just too little of. Someday, kids, someday. Until then I suggest Connecticut, it's a lovely place to get married.

(Text for the low-bandwidth.)

Listing of protests and rallies around the country.

The History of Made Up Rules Makes Me Shudder

Hey, Veterans!

Thank you.

I'll let Stan Ridgway, Billy Joel, and Tom Waits handle the music tonight with Camouflage, Goodnight Saigon, and Day After Tomorrow and leave the cartoons to those who draw way better:





...and to the veterans being made every day, get home safe.

Hey, Veterans!