Wednesday, January 24, 2007

I now understand why people do it the shady way.

The new passport rules that went into effect the other day got us thinking about getting passports. I was psyched because of that old dream of mine to be a spy, and have a passport for each country with different facial hair and names...learn from me, children: your dreams mean little in this cruel world.

Nan had gotten a passport back in the '90s to prove she was who her library card said she was, so my memories of passport procurement are a mix of feelings, all of which I'll call just nostalgia for the endless bureaucracy and the Woolworth's in Cross Country, which had the passport photo machine installed just after Nan got her passport.

Keep in mind that I do not travel. I wouldn't get on an airplane unless an unconscious B.A. Baracus was thrown on top of me, and I don't really ever, you know, leave my tree except to gather food, but by God, when it comes time to abandon my country, I will be prepared.

However...the county clerks office website only has links to forms that result in 404 errors and a note about the $97 fee required for the passport.

97 x 3 = we will just have to stay in the country.

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